Bezizzle Frizizzles

Best friends.

Are.

Better than.

Snorting crack.

Where would anyone be without their best friend? They'd be pathetic, lonely, empty losers (to put it nicely.) A best friend is not there to shop with you or search for hot people or talking shit about other people -they can do that but they're there for so much more.

Best friends are supposed to be a child with you no matter if you're 5 or 90, they'll stick with you when you're being an asshole, and hopefully do anything and everything you guys can come up with.

Personally, my best friend is the shit. We met last year, but I feel like we were in the womb together-- or maybe we were even attached at the head.

We have no shame, we'll send each other texts with pictures of bruises and cuts or hardcore hickeys. I call my best friend....Smelly K.

Last summer we covered ourselves in pirate tattoos we bought at Walgreens (every time we're there we check out the toy aisle.) That summer we also purchased a giant bag of army men from said toy aisle and battled out on the sidewalk outside of Papa Gino's.

Ever done the Safety Dance? We have. One of our many theme songs happens to be the Safety Dance-- "everybody look at your hands." You know the one with the video containing the crazy midget dancing around and the intense guy with the vest? We performed the safety dance out on a dock nearby Smelly K's house. At the end of the dance (which made us seem like we needed a high dose of Ritalin,) we heard someone call out "nice moves!" A man from the coast guard had been watching us dance the whole time... it was great. Pretty funny, I thought he had said "nice boobs" at first and got a little freaked out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcOZ6xFxJqg

There are so many stories that could be told about Smelly K and I. She's my bestest pal, and I'd be so boring without her. If you don't have a best friend, get one lickedy split.

*check out us eating grossness*